Some Really Bad Rabbinic Humor

Warren, the sole commenter on yesterday’s post on Humor and Religion, suggests that Rabbis aren’t necessarily un-funny, just that they don’t know their limitations or their audiences. I’d like to counter with some examples of things that I’ve come up with that I believe are absolutely hilarious, but are usually either not understood or provoke much groaning. Here goes:

• A friend (also a Rabbi) wants to open a Mexican restaurant in Jerusalem and call it ‘Ir Tzion Tamales’. I’d like to run its delivery service, whose claim-to-fame would be ‘schlepping yiddishe nachos’


• Continuing on the food theme, I’d open a restaurant in Efrat call ‘Uchla D’Efrat’ (if you haven’t learned Gemara Beitzah, you won’t get it), a combination café/ Beit Midrash called ‘Hafuch!’, and a combination pub/ Beit Midrash called ‘LagerHeads’.


• I think there should be a male beauty pageant in the Gush, with the winner crowned ‘Etzion Gever’.


• I want to start a comic-book series with heroes who include:
• Halakhic Man – who is impervious to any heat not generated directly by fire, and can construct and impenetrable barrier with sticks placed approximately 9 inches apart from each other.
• Neo-Orthodox- who flies around destroying the illusory nature of this world, demonstrating that there’s an entirely alternate version or reality accessible to those willing to set themselves free; of course, he’s persecuted by the powers that be.
• Tom Pagum- who, despite his disgusting appearance, steps in at key moments to save the day. He’s a misunderstood hero, and thus prefers to remain unnoticed.

Ok, Warren, still think it’s just about trying too hard to be a comedian?